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Trip to Bethany 9th February to 24th February 2004 – Graham and Sheila Pountain


Report on events as seen by Sheila

About four days before leaving for Bethany a lady made a chance remark to me that was to alter my view of Bethany forever. The remark was “ I hope you have a lovely holiday!” Though a little taken aback I replied graciously, “I’m sure I will!” The more I thought about it the more I felt, Bethany, though a great and humbling experience , a holiday it is not!

Putting that to one side we sorted everything out for the trip and I knew that the main reason for going this time was to sort out all the paper work to enable the trip to happen. I then thought, well, maybe it will be more of a “holiday” than usual! There of course will be the trip to Dar-es Salaam  and the visit to the Ministry of Home Affairs (to collect passports) not to mention the visit to the British High Commission ( to obtain visas).  So off we went on 9th February. Graham spent most of the main flight in the toilet as he had apparently eaten something to upset his stomach (strange because that is usually my trick) but I was ok!

We were met by Paulo and Ibra at the airport, then later by Daniel and after the usual shopping and errands in Mwanza eventually arrived at Bethany. The approach to Bethany particularly from Magu was, I recall, really beautiful. As there had been quite a lot of rain over the previous few days, there seemed to be so much greenery and the whole landscape looked lush and when the lake came into view, wow, I thought, this could be an exotic holiday location!

Bethany’s vegetation had been flourishing! There were lots of flowers, the leaves green and plenty of green grass. All the vegetables and fruits were growing well and even the animals looked fitter than usual especially Bertha! The children were their usual happy selves and greeted us with smiles making us feel really welcome!

After settling in we got down to the nitty gritty of sorting out all the application forms for all 31 children and 6 adults. Graham had to write a history of the Bethany Project, programme and costings and my job was to do individual case histories of each child as requested on the visa application forms including where they came from and why come to Bethany as opposed to any other children’s home. Easier said than done! I thought there would be files on each child going back to the beginning but found that not to be the case. For the most recent children everything was up-to-date but many of the other children’s beginnings were hardly known. With Onesmo’s help I sifted through some files with one or two Swahili translations and then we decided to talk to some of the children to find out what they could remember of their days before Bethany. One or two clearly did not want to remember and that was fine! Others told some harrowing tales of what had happened to them. I began to feel extremely uncomfortable with this job! Questioning these poor children about their past lives really began to upset me! Then, I began to read the reports already written by Kuleana or by social welfare before they arrived at Bethany. As I entered the information into the computer I felt so anguished by the tragic beginnings many of these children had endured.

I think it was on Thursday of the first week ( 12th Feb) that a strange thing happened. For all the time I had been coming to Bethany I had really kept these children at a distance, mentally,  probably for my own self-preservation.  Oh, I knew all Graham had told me from the early days and had seen first hand on 3 separate occasions, but suddenly, here before my eyes, was the truth of  who these now happy, healthy, intelligent children had once been. As I looked at the confidence of many of them being able to laugh, sing and play with each other and yet knowing the pain and suffering so many had gone through – I suddenly felt that I really knew them. These children deserved the best! They had gone through so much and I admired how they coped with their past lives and had moved on to become members of a new family caring for each other.
At this point I feel I should point out a couple of things. One or two of you who knew me back when Graham first became involved with Bethany will already know how I used to feel. I definitely did not want him to become involved with Bethany and when he did I felt quite resentful, especially during the early days! This eased over the years but, I suspect, I had just put these thoughts to the back of my mind. It was the events of Sept/Oct 2002 that really made me feel I needed to be with Graham helping him through those awful months. To support Graham I think, rather than Bethany! The subsequent visits by me had always seemed to be for a specific reason. I could cope by being cold and distancing myself from the real situation. But now this!!!
How can you distance yourself from children who have been starved of love and affection for the early part of their lives?
The real test came on the following morning, Friday 13th. Along with a social welfare lady,
Graham, Onesmo and I went to a village close to Magu to pick up two little brothers whose father had stated that he could no longer care for them. Their mother had left soon after the youngest one’s birth. I did not prepare myself for what was to be found! The tiniest, flimsiest mud hut covered in holes. Inside was an old sack in one corner, presumably for the boys to sleep on and a few dirty plastic plates and bowls on the floor. Marco 3, was finishing off some food from a bowl, absolutely scraping the sides clean while Masanga 2, just sat in a corner looking half dead. Both boys only had tatty T shirts on and no trousers.
The father handed Masanga to me and oh, what a shock!! He was icy cold, bearing in mind I had sweat dripping from my forehead because of the heat, and he just lay limp in my arms. His little eyes were opening and closing in slow motion, as was every other movement he made. I carried him gently to the Land Rover and tried to cover him with my body to pass on some heat. I thought he would pass away in my arms. Oh, how I prayed with tears in my eyes, for him to last until we got to Bethany. My prayers were answered and we arrived at Bethany where both boys were taken to the clinic. They both had some food and Marco soon got into the swing of Bethany life. Masanga however, seemed to worsen. He had gone so long without food that his tiny tummy could not take any in. At this point you realise how little you can do and how much you rely on God’s intervention! As I write this report in our room at the Sleep Inn Hotel in Dar-es-Salaam on Saturday 21st February I don’t know if Masanga will survive much longer. All we can do is pray! This is what Bethany is all about!!!!
To see the poverty and desperation that so many people living in Tanzania have to endure puts life in a new perspective. Another comment made to me some time ago was that helping with the children at Bethany was “only a drop in the ocean” in caring for the needy, and yes, that’s absolutely correct when you look around the country. But what a difference Bethany has made to the children who live there!

Another observation I made on this visit was that sometimes when people go to Bethany on a short visit, they can so easily miss all the things going on behind the scenes. To see Onesmo stay behind to help Rehema with her school work when he should be at home with his family or Daniel talking and listening to the children in confidence hoping to understand and help with their problems. Jane staying with Masanga all night in the girls’ dormitory whilst he is ill - the love and care is endless!  I think we can all jump to conclusions about what is going on without being fully aware of all that goes into looking after a family of over 40 children with so few ‘parents’ (compared to the UK).

To conclude I would just like to go back to the comment I made at the beginning concerning whether visiting Bethany is a holiday or not! I suppose I should ask “what is a holiday?” To me a holiday is somewhere to go to relax, eat the food of your choice and enjoy yourself. In my experience though and certainly hearing from others views, many holidays are a disappointment. Things don’t live up to expectation!
Now Bethany on the other hand always lives up to expectation! No, you don’t eat yourself silly with food you think you will like and then regret it. No, you can’t relax but what fun you have getting involved in the children’s activities and seeing the children growing in faith and maturity. Now, enjoy yourself – do you enjoy yourself at Bethany? I would say that the fulfillment and feeling of satisfaction gained from visiting Bethany can so easily be put on a par with enjoyment!
So yes, I did have a lovely holiday at Bethany!!!!!

 

Comments regarding this report would be most welcome, e-mail Sheila (click here)